Wednesday - Apr 24, 2019

Home / Commentary / THE DIARY of a FANTASY VIRGIN: Week 11


What a week. Donald Trump wins the presidency of the United States of America! The New England Patriots lose only their second game of the year! You have to admit both deserve exclamation points. For all of you out there, you must understand that this is part of the population of unknown uknowns. Sure you can concentrate on the known knowns. And you look at the known unknowns. But life throws you a curve now and again and you are the recipient of an unknown unknown. It makes some people sad.

For many there is despair and there are thoughts that it is all over. Just to keep you in line we are talking all over for the Patriots. Ok good, we are on the same page.  Two quotes come to mind.  How about imparting the wisdom of John “Bluto” Blutarsky from the 1978 film Animal House when he said among other things on his rant “Was it over when the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor?”(on a side note Kevin Bacon was 19 years old and had a role in this movie and one could statistically argue almost all of his 6 degrees of separation from Kevin Bacon come from this movie appearance alone.  But I digress.) And then for the other quote I must quote the band of my youth…R.E.M.

“It’s The End of The World As We Know It …. And I Feel Fine!”

A wonderful song written by Michael Stipe, Peter Buck, Bill Berry, and Mike Mills.  Michael Stipe and Mike Mills harmonize and drive home the lyrics that brought the band a solid 69 on the Bilboard top 100. What does this all mean? It means exactly that. The song is better than a 69 rating on the top 100. Heck for me, I played it four times on my last night of College Radio on WNEK FM Springfield. Yes, I was a DJ. Yikes!

I guess what I am saying is that it is all about perspective. For Patriots fans they cannot see a way that their defense will ever stop another drive. Not the defense can a Super Bowl necessarily win.   But we had football this weekend and my team has a Sunday win.

Sunday Win

Just when my team is in trouble and as a loser of two weeks in a row will let you know, I get enough of a performance from WR Demaryius Thomas and WR Brandin Cooks to deliver a Sunday win. This means my editor sees my article up to 12 hours early. Hey now. I still have WR Odell Beckham Jr going tonight but my opponent has no one going and I have a lead. Only 1 TD for the entire team will do that to you. Sometimes you find the end zone and sometimes you do not. My 3 TDs, not including Odell Beckham Jr’s performance on Monday Night Football, secured my victory and now I am 6-4. I need one more win to secure a winning season above .500. Speaking of which, it is the 10th week and this means I have to talk about the state of the fantasy football league I am the commissioner of.


State Of The League

With the Fantasy Football season in its last few weeks before the playoffs, I take Week 11 to determine the state of the league in which I am the commish. This is about the state of parity in my league to let you get perspective on the teams and outcomes in your league. I am here to report that there are only 4 teams over .500 in my 10 team league. There are 6 teams at .500 or below. This means, like most years, the consistent teams with more wins than losses go to the few teams with very successful and consistent players. My diary entry is about a super moon for the ages and other stuff.

Dear Diary

Super Moon! It was the largest one since 1948. The next one this large will not make an appearance for another 35 years. The intersection of a full moon at perigee with the earth is the cause of such a dilemma. Tides are larger than normal and the local constabulary claims that weirdness is out and about because the blood is being pulled from your body in a freakish way. Oh well. All I know is that the moon is huge and people take pictures and talk about it. It was bright. It was cool. It was big. Hello super moon.

There is a Chinese proverb that says “May you live in interesting times”. I think that is about to happen.


Master D.

Tim can now be reached at and welcomes your opinions on the Diary of a Fantasy Virgin Articles.

About Tim Davoll

Author of the Weekly Series "Diary of a Fantasy Virgin" since opening day of That particular date? It was September 12, 2002 when my first article was published on this site. It has been a great ride ever since.