Tuesday - Mar 9, 2021

Home / Commentary / DIARY OF A FANTASY VIRGIN: Week 13


Happy Thanksgiving to everyone I know and don’t know. I will be giving thanks this year for what my family possesses. I wish your time with your family brings about a more Norman Rockwell moment with that turkey than a National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation sequence of events with the same type of bird. The turkey appears in the same position on the plate but with vastly different outcomes whether they are imagined or unimagined. This week we talk about my team’s playoff outlook. But before we do, let’s look at what is on tap this Thursday in the NFL.

The Thanksgiving games this year are Detroit hosting Chicago, Dallas hosting Buffalo, and we end the evening with New Orleans traveling to Georgia to take on Atlanta. Get your Pumpkin Pie and tryptophan on and enjoy! Mythbusters proved in an episode labeled Food Fables it is the calories and not the Tryptophan that put my Uncle Stanley to sleep after Thanksgiving. So with that in mind my team has been sleepwalking all week but it comes to pass that I bring excellent news.

The Virginator Has Secured a Playoff Spot

With one week to go, I have secured a playoff spot. As for my game tonight, all I need to have happened is tight end Mark Andrews to make any combination of catches and yards to get five points. I only need five points and getting five said points is actually statistically a real no-brainer. But through the first half, he only had one point, leaving me perilously on the outside looking in and on the verge of my worst loss. But in the end, he made an additional catch, got to six points on two catches for 45 yards and I won.

And with that, The Cromwell Demolition have secured a championship playoff spot in the Husky Blue Fantasy Football League with one week to go! I have also secured a winning season. I will be shoring up my team and trying to figure out the next opportunity for the big score. That means more of the FantasySharks.com for me and everyone who reads this article. The big push is on.

My diary entry is of course about All Things Thanks.

Dear Diary

Thanksgiving has arrived for 2019. The event is punctuated by some great dessert. Another weird thing is just how many people in my family rose up early or did not even go to bed to line up for Black Friday deals. Not only lining up but battling the crowds for some unique deals. You have to be vigilant and have a strategy to be successful on Black Friday so good luck if you are to brave the masses and mother nature.

Black Friday is the name given to all the retailers who supposedly just broke even the Wednesday before Thanksgiving for all of their yearly expenses, marking this Friday as the day and the rest of the days it goes into the Black until Dec. 31. It just so happens to be one week later than last year. Does this mean that every store is taking one extra week to get into the black? This means only four weekends before Christmas. This means ….

  • One less weekend to shop.
  • One less weekend to decorate.
  • One less weekend to party.
  • One less weekend to plan.
  • One less weekend to have stress.

What I have observed is that the same amount of effort is put into Christmas every year. The only issue with a condensed window of time just means the same activity over less time, which means more volume. So watch the volume get turned up to 11 like from the movie This is Spinal Tap. I guess we can all hunker down and Amazon it.

Christmas will sneak up on everyone so plan your Christmas festivities wisely.

Happy Thanksgiving Everyone!

Master D.

Tim Davoll can now be reached at tdavoll@fantasysharks.com and welcomes your opinions on the “Diary of a Fantasy Virgin” articles.

About Tim Davoll

Author of the Weekly Series "Diary of a Fantasy Virgin" since opening day of FantasySharks.com. That particular date? It was September 12, 2002 when my first article was published on this site. It has been a great ride ever since.