Tuesday - Nov 12, 2019

Home / Commentary / DIARY OF A FANTASY VIRGIN: Week 6

DIARY OF A FANTASY VIRGIN: Week 6

The NFL comes into Week 6 with all of these strange issues. Teams that should win do not. See the Kansas City Chiefs at home. See the Dallas Cowboys at home. Players that were number one in receiving yards are held back. See Keenan Allen. Somehow Jameis Winston cannot find Mike Evans for one catch the whole game! Deshaun Watson goes for a 55 burger. What does this all mean? Welcome to the NFL. Just when you think you have figured out something the NFL proves you have figured out nothing. Speaking of nothing, I am out of Survivor. Those Kansas City Chiefs have to win!

Survive This

The Kansas City Chiefs are all by their lonesome playing in front of the largest watching NFL audience against the Indianapolis Colts on Sunday night. Whenever Patrick Mahomes is on the field something magical happens. It is time to see Patrick Mahomes work his spell. But what if Indianapolis runs the ball over 30 times? What if they use this formula to consume 18 out of 21 consecutive minutes? What if Sammy Watkins goes to the sideline and never returns? What if Patrick Mahomes turns his ankle twice and he cannot get out of the pocket? In a classic survivor trap game, I find a way to lose. This was the first time this year I went with the obvious Survivor pick and in obvious fashion, I found a way to lose. Sometimes it is easier to just keep picking a loser. See the opponents of the Jets, Dolphins, and Bengals as somehow they will be a trap game one week. Just like the other trap game which was the Los Angeles Chargers and the Denver Broncos. The Broncos proved as difficult as it is to go 16-0 in this league it is just as difficult to go 0-16.

Who Did You Start?

So this is the time of year you can play the “Who’d Ya Start?” game. This is a game where you count your starters in the last week and did you draft them? If you have a winning record and you started more than 4 then congratulations. That is atypical. I started 4 drafted players out of 8. My bench also has 4 players who I did not draft. I have turned over my ½ of my team in only 5 weeks. Just to get to this point: Each week brings opportunities on the waiver wire and don’t feel badly if you are 0-5. And don’t get overconfident if you are 5-0. As for me, I am feast or famine and now relying on TE George Kittle and the 49ers DST.

Feast or Famine

This week is the week that I could see coming on draft day. Somehow in a strong QB league, Deshaun Watson fell to 8th and I grabbed him. In my league, Deshaun Watson went for a 55 burger. Out of one player that is statistically significant. So all I need is a measly 10 points or so from the rest of my team to win. But Keenan Allen goes for a 5 bunly (buns only-no burger). Mike Evans goes for a 0 bunly. Zero in a PPR league is so difficult I cannot get my mind around it. I still have a chance but I need the combination of George Kittle and the 49ers defense to go for 23 points. The 49ers at home should be no problem right? Yes! The 49ers delivered with George Kittle going for a 20 burger and the 49ers DST going for a 26 burger. Three burger performances totaling 101 points making me 3-2 and over .500 for the first time this year. My Diary Entry reveals that there is a generation of Americans unaccounted for and it shows up in the weirdest places.

Dear Diary

Something happened 50 years ago this year. No…we already know about the moon landing. But there was something else. The debut of The Brady Bunch happened 50 years ago. The first episode was September 26, 1969. Now this date has an intertwining generational effect that no one could have foresaw. Roughly everyone born from 1956 had a chance to see the first running of the show in prime time until it went off the air in 1974.

Then something strange happened; everyone born between 1965 and 1974 got to see it again in reruns after school up until about 1980. The timing was impeccable. The show played out every day after school so we were binge-watching the Brady Bunch show by getting 5 shows per week. It was the topic at school and everyone spoke about it in the playground and lunchtime. It was our “water cooler” show.

This intertwining translates into the realization that several million children born between 1956 and 1973 actually grew up Brady. The youngest children in the show went from about 8 years old to 13 years old. The middle children in the show went from about 11 years old to 16 years old. The oldest children went from 14 years old to 19 years old. It was Hollywood’s way of covering and spanning and cataloging a reflection of our actual lives in typical fashion from a girl and boy perspective. And to be honest with you the difference between 1980 and 1974 was not as large as you think. It was not the 80s yet.

So who could have ever imagined that the HGTV network would purchase the house in Studio City, California that served as the exterior shot in the television series and bring back all of the actors that played the Brady Bunch and renovate the house to look exactly like the home you saw on television. With 50-year-old working appliances and everything!

However, what has also come out of this is the backlash from those who did not grow up Brady. The reaction to the series appears to be actually based upon the writer and whether they grew up Brady. The negative comments and half praise all appear to be from people who did not grow up Brady. I can’t believe this is a thing! I have never seen so much written about a show that actually received the highest-rated season premiere at HGTV.

The interesting part is that this demographic cutoff continues to this day. Generally speaking, those born after 1980 do not talk about the show or at least exhibit very little interest. But that group born up until 1974 are blabbing on about it and smiling and just seem to be happy about the subject. That generation is generally gleeful about the show and state that there are not enough episodes. We want more!

It appears that The Brady Bunch is to us what Norman Rockwell was to a previous generation. Something that was not real but very real at the same time. The Brady Bunch Universe is now real and no longer in the minds of that generation or the result of a soundstage. Just drive by Clinton Way in Studio City, California and give it a look-see.

I think everyone needs that type of unrealism now and again.

Master D.

Tim can now be reached at tdavoll@fantasysharks.com and welcomes your opinions on the Diary of a Fantasy Virgin Articles.

About Tim Davoll

Author of the Weekly Series "Diary of a Fantasy Virgin" since opening day of FantasySharks.com. That particular date? It was September 12, 2002 when my first article was published on this site. It has been a great ride ever since.