Saturday - Jan 23, 2021

Home / Commentary / DIARY OF A FANTASY VIRGIN: Week 9


Election time in America has arrived along with Week 9 in the NFL. I hope you went out and voted. Unusually high turnout is occurring across America according to early information. I just am grateful to be able to cast my vote in a free country. All of the details seem to be superfluous because we are not Democrats and we are not Republicans. First and foremost, we are Americans and I wish everyone could look at it from a distance. But we can’t and cities across America are expecting civil unrest no matter what the outcome is. With Covid-19 the actual outcome will probably be delayed. Oh, the chaos! But we have fantasy football. It will still be here. In the ninth week I report on the state of my fantasy football league so let us get to it.

The State of the League

We have a 10-team league and there are only two divisions. They are named the East and the West divisions and interestingly enough six teams have a .500 record or above. We have four teams above .500 and four teams below .500. The top team has been winning with quarterback Josh Allen, running back Josh Jacobs, and mostly wide receiver DK Metcalf. Notice how the best performers week-in and week-out like DK Metcalf end up on the team with the best record in the league? Do you think there is a connection? Yes, most certainly, there is. But we have to get to the results from last week.

In honor of the road to the electoral college victory for the next president of the United States, I will take you through the thought process to try and deliver a victory in this last week’s matchup. Ironically, like the next president, I needed Florida (Tampa Bay defense/special teams) to deliver.

Five On a Bye Week What to Do?

As noted last week I went all out to secure a two-game lead in my division. I had to because this week saw several players on the bench and I was without two flex players (running back-wide receiver-tight end). What to do? Here was my path to victory. In these scenarios, we talk about the future as if it happened. I have no idea why I do this but I put down a bulleted list of my path to victory. It goes something like this … on Saturday, mind you. Below each bullet is what actually happened.

  • Quarterback Ryan Tannehill and running back Derrick Henry win big over Cincinnati.
    • False – Tennessee lost to Cincinnati.
  • My opponent is playing quarterback Russell Wilson so I play wide receiver Tyler Lockett because for every touchdown that Lockett gets Wilson gets six points but Lockett offsets him with his own six points.
    • False – DK Metcalf got all the receiving touchdowns. Hey San Francisco, how about double-teaming Metcalf so Tyler Lockett doesn’t go for just seven points?
  • Tight end Jimmy Graham is up and plays well against his old New Orleans team.
    • False – Graham goes for just three points. Something is wrong with Nick Foles when he is not in a Philadelphia helmet.
  • I need a flex player. How about running back Jamaal Williams? He was riding the pine and Minnesota gives up big offense.
    • True – Williams goes for 17 points. A very respectable pickup.
  • I need another flex player. How about wide receiver Brandon Aiyuk and his big play ability? The Seattle/San Francisco game should be a big score with both defenses under duress.
    • True – Aiyuk gets 23 points in rapid comeback time. Maybe you should consider this.
  • The Tampa Bay defense/special teams has to go for 25 against those New York Giants. They have to!
    • False – Tampa Bay gives up 23 points to a plucky New York Giants team. Plucky is unlucky!
  • Kicker Wil Lutz will luck out because the horrible windy weather in Chicago abates around 3 p.m. Eastern Standard Time.
    • True – Lutz delivers 17 points from the kicker position.

How did I do? I still had a chance but Russell Wilson throwing to DK Metcalf in combination with Tampa Bay defense/special teams woefully earning nine points along with Jimmy Graham just not involved in the offense made me lose. I was in it until the second half of the game last night squeezing out a two-point tenuous margin of victory — but it was all for naught.

I now have a 6-2 record but still have a two-game lead in my division. I could have had a grapple hold on my division. I have some players back and I have to decide about wide receiver Tyler Lockett.

My diary entry is about “burgers.”

Dear Diary

It is “burgers” time in fantasy football land. At this point of the year, I like to point out the Burger Award performances through Week 8. A Burger award is given to the player who exists above the statistical average. If you have a player on this list you should have a base to perform quite well the rest of the year.


Russell Wilson

Patrick Mahomes


Alvin Kamara

Dalvin Cook


Tyler Lockett

DK Metcalf

Calvin Ridley

DeAndre Hopkins

Stefon Diggs

Tyreek Hill


Travis Kelce



Tampa Bay

Kansas City


Randy Bullock

Younghoe Koo

Ryan Succop

Justin Tucker

Wil Lutz

Note that I have three of these players on my team. There is a connection. Now we are closing in on the last stretch of the fantasy football season. Let us get through this and figure out the next steps.

Shall we?

Master D.

Tim Davoll can now be reached at and welcomes your opinions on the “Diary of a Fantasy Virgin” articles.

About Tim Davoll

Author of the Weekly Series "Diary of a Fantasy Virgin" since opening day of That particular date? It was September 12, 2002 when my first article was published on this site. It has been a great ride ever since.