Wednesday - Jan 20, 2021

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DIARY OF A FANTASY VIRGIN: Week 15

Covid-19 Vaccinations started this week. The PFIZER / BIONTECH collaboration was the first to get FDA approval. May this be the light at the end of a long 275 day and counting tunnel. For in Southern New England it all started on March 16; kind of weird that it is getting distributed around December 16th and naturally to the frontline workers. The fastest vaccination creation and distribution in mankind up to this point. Operation Warp Speed started in March and was created by the U.S. Department of Health & Human Services with a goal of delivering 300 million vaccine doses by January 2021. It was actually Warp Speed in terms of vaccine creation, production, and distribution. What is that light I was talking about? It is a very small light now but hope has all of us with the ability to be vaccinated by the end of Q2 2021 who wish to take it. I hope to have lost my Covid-19 lbs gained by then. This is your Scylla and Charybdis moment. I have made my decision and my path is clear. I will have no hesitation in taking the vaccination because the alternative is actual death. If not for myself maybe to someone I spread the virus to accidentally, especially an elderly loved one or a fellow human being who has decided to not take the vaccination.

Don’t blink now but it is roughly ONE WEEK until Christmas 2020. Snow-Pocalypse! Snow-Mageddon! Snow-Topia! This article finds the writer on the brink of our first snowstorm in Southern New England over 4 inches in accumulation in almost 2 years. Why not make it a cool 12-18 inch affair right? Covid-19 snow clearing quarantine rules for everyone out there are as follows: I am not going anywhere. I am just going to watch the snow and clear it out sometime on Thursday or Friday or Saturday. Bring it on Mother Nature. I am stuck indoors. You are stuck outdoors. Someone has to blink first. This is the revenge for having not enough snow all of last year to use my snow thrower. I wonder if it will start up?

Week 15 in the NFL and I am in the Final Four of my league. I must provide full disclosure to everyone out there from the Fantasy Virgin regarding the dreaded word four. The previous 18 seasons of me “virgin-ing” up my Fantasy Football team with advice from this website has my average finish in my league coming in at dreaded number 4? Why? How can this be? Well, the playoffs are a little bit of luck. Sure you are only two wins away from a Fantasy Football championship? But how are you going to get there if the partner that brought you to the dance is injured or incapable of playing? Here are the outlines I require for a victory this week.

Outline For the Win Line

We all want to be on the winning line this time of year. All you need is two wins and the Fantasy Football Championship is yours. In the oddest professional football season, you will ever see. So I have been setting up my team for this moment. I will need 147 points to win because I am going up against a champion Fantasy Football team for two years running. Here is my outline.

I am going with a Tennessee Titan romp to victory over the Detroit Lions at home. Big numbers for QB Ryan Tannehill and RB Derrick Henry and WR Corey Davis and K Stephen Gostkowski. I am all in on the Titan dominant win. I need contributions from WR Brandon Aiyuk and WR T.Y. Hilton. Who knows who my TE will be but that has been my issue since I dropped TE Rob Gronkowski after 5 weeks of just awful performances. But he is now back and playing for one of the teams in our Final Four. Oh, the humanity. But who do I miss and wish they were here on my team?

I miss QB Drew Brees. At the end of the season, he was good for a 30 burger or more. I really miss WR Will Fuller and WR Tyler Lockett. I know Tyler is still playing but not getting more than 10 fantasy points in a 40-3 blowout over the NY Jets is an uh-oh moment. He has to ride the pine if I am going to be on the Win Line! So how can you win? After years of doing this generally, the best players on the best teams deliver for you. Another part is your opponent. For myself, I need QB Aaron Rodgers to freeze up his throwing shoulder because of the cold in Lambeau. I need RB Alvin Kamara to cool off just one week. Just one! I want them to play their best but just not score points if that makes any sense. Well, now you know what I am up against how should you handle this week? So here is how you should choose your lineup.

Choosing Your Lineup

I have some advice about over-thinking. Over-thinking is the worst. So let us try to keep it simple.

  • Choose the player on your team that is playing on the team with the best record and therefore has the best motivation to win.

In that way, you will never feel bad about your decision. You went down with the best-of-the-best this year in the NFL in terms of team and most likely the best players are on that best team. One of the results could be just like last week’s Monday Night Fantasy bonanza shootout between The Baltimore Ravens and The Cleveland Browns. You just have to get to the championship game and cross that bridge when you get there.

My Dear Diary entry is about one week from Christmas but first I have to talk about Grogu.

Dear Diary

Li’l Yoda is now officially named Grogu. This 50-year-old Lannik (Yoda’s species) has adored us all in the Disney+ series known as The Mandalorian. I will not get into specifics here but if you have not seen The Mandalorian and you are a Star Wars fan well it is about time if you find yourself all shopped out and out of Covid-19 quarantine ideas. Grogu is yet another complex Jedi-type character that reaches out with the force and has emotional issues because he has been away for 50 years. This probably with no doubt has something to do with his father. (Star Wars joke there.) So watch it if you can. You will smile. We all need to smile these days. That Li’l Yoda emmm Grogu is operated by three robotics experts and the little guy just comes to life and melts your heart all the way through. Now on to Christmas.

So you can purchase all things Grogu and I am certain there will be many Grogu like things under the Christmas tree. But watch out. This Friday is the last shopping Friday before Christmas. What? Speaking of Operation Warp Speed, the time between working on leftovers from Thanksgiving to now has gone in a flash. We lost one week of Christmas shopping because of the late Thanksgiving and given the Covid-19 time compression it has all come to the front of the mind. I know shopping is mostly being done online but everything is being done online. That means if you think the shipping was delayed during the quarantine high days in March and April, just wait for the next few days.

Shop now! Now! I have spoken.

Master D.

Tim can now be reached at tdavoll@fantasysharks.com and welcomes your opinions on the Diary of a Fantasy Virgin Articles.

About Tim Davoll

Author of the Weekly Series "Diary of a Fantasy Virgin" since opening day of FantasySharks.com. That particular date? It was September 12, 2002 when my first article was published on this site. It has been a great ride ever since.