Welcome to The Lowdown for Week 9. This is my little corner of the fantasy football universe — feel free to pull up a chair and stay awhile!
This week, I wanted to get serious with my commentary. You see, about six months ago, my best friend in the world collapsed while riding the subway in New York City. When the cops got to him, he had stopped breathing and didn’t have a pulse. The officers began CPR and got him to a local hospital; after roughly 20 minutes of working on him, they were able to get him breathing. But as you can guess, after 20 minutes of essentially being dead, he wasn’t registering any brain activity. He was given only a 5% chance to live, and even less of a chance to ever wake up.
I rushed to his bedside, torn up by grief. The doctors were trying an experimental technique to see if they could revive him (essentially putting him in a cryogenic state), but they cautioned against optimism. While his parents sat outside his room, his brother and I went in to see him. Not wanting to accept reality, I started talking to him about the N.Y. Giants. All the off-season transactions, reviews of their draft class… anything I could think of that he’d enjoy, working off the premise that people in comas can hear what’s going on around them. As I was talking to him, I mentioned that the Giants had signed OL Mike Remmers (a guy he wanted the Giants to sign)… and suddenly all the monitors he was hooked up to started beeping. His brother and I looked at each other in amazement. We called the nurse, but she explained it was just coincidence… the monitors had not registered any brain activity.
A few days went by and the fact that my friend was still alive was a minor miracle in itself– despite still being in a coma. One day, during one of my daily visits, I was alone in his room talking about– you guessed it– football. As I was talking, he suddenly opened his eyes and looked right at me. I freaked out. I grabbed his hand, and talked to him– told him where he was, what had happened. Since he had a breathing tube in, he couldn’t talk, but his eyes told me that he was “there”, not just having a mechanical reaction to my voice. I called out to his parents, and told them what happened, and that they should stay with him and talk to him while I ran to get the attending physician. After about a day, he was awake and starting to respond to doctors’ directions.
Fast forward six months, and my friend is nearly fully recovered. He’s walking around, going about his life. Remarkably, there’s been no brain damage, no real disability. He’s considered a walking miracle in the NYC medical community, so much so that they are planning to write a chapter on his treatment and outcomes for the journals. Of course, he’s been interviewed by both clerics and doctors about whether or not he experienced anything on the “other side”, but he says he has no memory of anything like a bright light or seeing dead relatives or anything similar. Nothing at all.
So I have my best friend back, alive and well, and I couldn’t be more relieved. But I’m starting to think he’s been lying about not going over to the “other side”… you see, for the first time ever, he’s 8-0 in our fantasy league (which has been around since we were in college). Every move he makes has worked out for him, even the seemingly stupid ones. I mean he drafted Chase Edmonds, he’s hit big on all his rookie picks (Devin Bush, Josh Jacobs, Nick Bosa) and is out-scoring his closest rival (that would be me) by 15 PPG. This can’t be coincidence… I figure he must’ve consulted with Vince Lombardi and Bill Walsh on the other side, ’cause there’s no way he’s ever been this good at fantasy football. Which is really the lesson of this story: avoid competitive endeavors with someone who beat back death when it came knocking as they can’t be intimidated.
Working Hard for the Money
This past summer, I asked my readers to help me achieve some personal goals, to wit: 500 new subscribers to my Twitter and Youtube channels. They’re both 100 percent free. Let’s face it, these rankings take some effort and it’d be nice to see some love heading back my way from you people … I don’t care if you actually consume any of the content at my Riot links, but your subscribing allows me to get some perks on those platforms.
So far, we’ve popped by about 150 subscribers on each platform. That’s good, but I’d like to keep marching towards that goal of 500 new subscribers by season’s end. So please consider helping out… thanks! Check this video about why soccer should NEVER be referred to as “football”.
Interesting Players for This Week
Straight from the flawless algorithms of Mighty Max come the top match-ups at every position for this weekend’s games …
Note #1: The value associated with each player indicates the likelihood of that player having the best score at his position that week; it’s not a representation of his score for the week. A carat (^) symbol next to a player’s name indicates an injury designation negatively impacting his ranking.
Note #2: Computers don’t deal in “hunches”; all projections are data based… so only players who have at least one game of statistics are considered in my models.
Teams on bye this week: Bengals, Falcons, Rams, Saints.