Initially built by NASA to set lines for the Las Vegas casinos in the late 50’s (who do you think funded the Apollo missions? The government? It was the mob…), The Sin City Betbot 6000 calculated lines for over 30 years. The Betbot was given various upgrades through the years, not always with the best equipment, but he was very good at setting lines, and living the good life.
The Betbot was de-commissioned in 1990 after San Francisco destroyed Denver in the Super Bowl. The 45 point spread simply fried a number of the Betbot’s wires and he retired. The Betbot was discovered by Fantasysharks.com and retooled to give fantasy advice. He lives now to give his own unique, well cultured take on the NFL.The Sin City Betbot 6000 Presents is transcribed by Joe Petrizzi and Tom Walls because “typing.. .BZZT… is a dame’s job”.
Be sure to follow on twitter @betbot6k
This summer I had nothing to do. Without anything newsworthy on the NFL front I basically loafed around on the strip, hopping to the different sports books looking for interesting futures. But I’m a bleepin’ robot. And I’ve been doing this a long time. I’m not going to get my skin in the game unless I see some traction on the labor talks, right? Why so much posturing from both sides when they really just needed to talk it out honestly with each other? I figured what I really needed was to get Roger Goodell, DeMaurice Smith, and some of the other power players in a room with me and a bottle or two of Gin. To any real man, Gin is the ultimate truth serum. It has unstoppable power. More powerful than even the Lasso of Truth.
Anyway, that got me thinking about Wonder Woman. Which of course got me thinking about that fox, Lynda Carter. Wow, she’s a doll. Back in 1974 we used to be quite an item after we met during a taping of Starsky and Hutch. I was on set to meet up with David Soul because we were into this regular high stakes poker game, and she was filming a bit part. Lynda was new to the action but always sharp to recognize a fish in the room so she came with us and that was the start of a wonderful time in our lives. I always knew she would be a star – with her beauty pageant looks, she was a slam dunk.
In the spring of ‘75 I called in a favor with an ABC exec. looking to cast the new Wonder Woman, needing someone with a bit more moxie than Cathy Lee Crosby. *Cathy, if you are reading, you know I love you. And what that scab Joe Theismann tried to do to you borders on the criminal. But you could never be Diana Prince.* One look from ABC and they knew Lynda was their girl, and the rest is history. I will not get into the sordid details concerning our private lives and the Lasso of Truth, but let me tell you that it is large enough to wrap around at least two women and one 50’s era robot. Growl. Anyway, Lynda and I soon grew apart due to the rigors of her TV schedule but you can bet that I will not soon forget her, or the time some paparazzi caught us coming out of the bathroom at Caesars Palace:
On with the show!
Steelers -11-5 –
What can I say? The Steelers know how to win. They do it with a very good defense and runn…errr… no their running game isn’t great. Their running game is nothing to write home about, but they trust their run game to protect the leads they build with Big Ben (keep it in yer pants, Boy-o) and their deep threats. They have 3 very good WRs and
Blockin’ Hines Ward
. A tough schedule keeps them out of the 12 win club, but they win their division again.
Ravens – 9-7 –
Age finally does what the Law couldn’t; slow
down to the point of mediocrity (or imprisonment). While no one will surpass Lewis in spastic attention grabbing poop dancing before games, offenses will be able to surpass Lewis down the field.
injuries are also slowing him down and he won’t be much help either. The Ravens will score more, but give up more points. Chalk up one loss to the improving Browns and the Ravens don’t reach 10 wins this year.
Browns – 8-8 – Colt McCoy
is the future of this franchise, and the future looks pretty good. Of course, a cupcake schedule helps for 2011. Look for Cleveland to ride
until he breaks (and he will break this year or next) to provide some cover for the improving McCoy. I don’t like the defense, and this team isn’t ready to win consistently; but the Browns step forward this year.
Bengals – 5-11 –
Gosh, this team blows. Another easy schedule gives the Bengals a couple late season wins they don’t deserve. But this team is the worst in the NFL this year, make no mistake. The team needs a change in ownership, and the city deserves it. Maybe
can be a savior next year; but there is precious little around him.