Friday - Jan 22, 2021

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The Diary of a Fantasy Virgin: Week 11

Hear Ye! Hear Ye! Hear Ye! To one and all I wish a Happy Thanksgiving. We are the first nation to celebrate and give thanks for all that we have. So let us give thanks for what we have and look forward to a brighter and prosperous holiday season. Dare I say that sometimes you win because of the other team. So let us see the week that was.

When The Other Team Finally Steps In It

I have Michael Vick. I have Jeremy Maclin. Last week I sat Larry Fitzgerald, which led to a loss. I have to find a quarterback. What am I to do? Sometimes it does not matter because of the other team. Just look at the week that Ryan Fitzpatrick, Greg Jennings, Jermichael Finley and Mike Tolbert had. If I were to tell you that those four dudes went for 21 points you would think that I am crazy. Heck. My replacement quarterback John Skelton went for -2 points. How can that happen? Well it did, and yet I still eked out a win. This leaves me with a 6-4-1 record with three weeks to go. I will have to run the table if I want to win the division. It is officially go time and I have to go and find another quarterback I guess.

Is Everyone In Your League Around .500?

In my league there are two teams four games or more below .500. In my league there are two teams four games or more above .500. The other eight teams are within a few games of .500. I may mention this yearly but I am constantly amazed how difficult it is to be undefeated or way above .500. We have one such team this year in my league. Something drives each team to be at or around .500. I guess that is the same reason why San Francisco and Detroit are surprisingly doing well and Indianapolis is just not there this year. Past trends do not a future certainty make in this NFL environment. My diary entry as usual goes into giving thanks.

Dear Diary

Thanksgiving is about managing demons small and large. Each demon possesses all of us and we are none the wiser. There is the demon that gets into arguments with that crazy uncle. There is that side of us finding new ways to annoy that distant aunt. All of these demons come alive in the presence of other family members. How strange is that? But it would not be a Thanksgiving without the other members of your family.

So enjoy the turkey. So enjoy the stuffing. Enjoy the mashed potatoes and the green bean casserole. But it goes without saying that you should enjoy the company of everyone in your family. As time slips through our grasp, reflections of the future get cloudier and more uncertain.

Make the present clear and make your family understand how important they are to you. Because the time keeps going, and pretty soon it will be another year over.

Please enjoy your turkey and your family and those leftovers and the three football games. Happy Thanksgiving again, and to all may you have a great week. I think I will be battling leaves on the ground and leaves in the gutters.

Master D.

Tim can now be reached at and welcomes your opinions on the “Diary of a Fantasy Virgin” articles.

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