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The Diary of a Fantasy Virgin: Week 14

Two weeks to Christmas and the end of the regular season in fantasy football. After careful inspection of the scores, all I can say is get your shopping done now. As far as my team goes, it is going out with a whimper. We get to take this opportunity to look back at the year. And with Week 14 gone, so is my season.

The Year That Was

This year was going to be different with the familiar twist. Sure, I would relive my role as a fantasy football virgin but also I became the commissioner of my league. This meant organizing the draft and setting up the scoring system. I made quarterbacks strong. Instead of three points per touchdown in the air, I gave the quarterback the full credit and for each touchdown thrown (six points). Strangely, not everyone cared in the least, and in the first round only five quarterbacks went out of 12 slots. The team with the best record drafted ninth and took Philip Rivers. In round eight, he took Matthew Stafford and rode that arm for most of the year. I got my record to 6-4-1 and then nosedived for three straight losses to end the year. So I end the year with a record of 6-7-1. I not only fell out of first in my division but I fell to third.

The Week That Was

The week started off with Michael Vick coming back and he put up a middle of the road effort. But at least he outscored my kicker, which hasn’t happened a lot lately. Excellent efforts by Larry Fitzgerald and Neil Rackers set me up for the victory. But Demarco Murray left the game injured. Vernon Davis did not find the end zone and Steven Jackson seems to be getting platooned with Carnell ‘Cadillac’ Williams. Oh the humanity. I appear to be headed to the second tier of the playoffs in our league. This means the best I can finish this year is fifth. I sometimes get the feeling like I should shake up my team for the playoffs this year. How can I bench Fitzgerald?  

Master D.

Tim can now be reached at and welcomes your opinions on the “Diary of a Fantasy Virgin” articles.

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