Oh yeah, hear that Jimi Hendrix riff in the background. Takin’ me back! I’m playing it while the Broncos/Bengals game is on and muted. No need to pay attention to what Al Michaels and Big John Madden are saying, I just hit the mute button if I see something I want to hear about.
But are you experienced? Playing fantasy football is like anything else in life. The more experience you have the smarter you tend to be. You see situations you’ve seen before. You probably made mistakes, like dropping Isaac Bruce when he has a couple bad weeks. Yeah, I did that a couple years ago, and paid the price as he lit up the fantasy football scoreboards. Or picking up Michael Bennett in hopes that his injury problems are behind him. Experienced owners know injury prone players don’t suddenly change their spots…well, maybe a particular Jaguar named Taylor is the exception to the rule.
That exception thing, it works both ways. We all know a few mental munchkins who still insist on donating their cash in our money leagues. Nothing wrong with that, right? We all need a little fodder, right? Even in the Atlantic Hammerhead Shark League we seem to have a couple guys who aren’t paying attention to their teams. It makes a difference when you start out 0-3, 0-4 or even 0-5, kinda like the Miami Dolphins. Eventually you get a Rams team coming into your house expecting a cake walk and instead get their lunch money taken and beaten to a pulp.
This year has been especially difficult with the multitude of injuries that plagued the early weeks. Suddenly guys like Mewelde Moore, Reuben Droughns, and Brad Hoover become hot commodities. An inexperienced owner will panic, sometimes to the point where they give up the season a little too soon. They miss out on the Droughns’, Moore’s and Hoover’s of the fantasy football world and an chance to get back into the hunt. In addition there is a lot of transitioning. Old reliables like Ahman Green, Marvin Harrison and Chad Johnson have been kinda quiet, at least until this week. But guys like Michael Clayton, Eric Johnson, Mewelde Moore, Antonio Gates are making big rips in the fabric of fantasy football.
Some people don’t want to pay that close attention to rosters and teams, coaches decisions and tendencies. The way I figure, those people aren’t spending much time on FantasySharks.com. They are probably paying one of those subscription sites and feeling smug about how smart they are, until they run into a league full of sharks. I think we should create a new shark level, the piranha shark, cause that is what those guys feel like when they dive into a shark league…stripped to the bone. Blood in the water sharks, it’s time to feast!
Why would you spend your money and time on anything if you weren’t in it to win it? I’ve never said that out loud, preferring to take the low road, and the suckers money, if they are willing to donate it. But it still makes me wonder, why? This may be a sport played on a computer, with spreadsheets and cheat sheets but to most of us it is as important as the real game that the sport is based on. Nothing is finer than a cold brew and a hot smack talking session with another fantasy owner, especially when you have Priest Holmes with his foot squarely on the throat of your opponent. Make him sweat, hear him squeal! Yeah baby! And if you play in my office league…make him buy lunch after you throttle him!
If you aren’t experienced (and quite frankly even if you are) you are in luck. Because here in the world of Fantasysharks.com, we have a few simple rules which we’ve lovingly dubbed –
“The Shark Tank Fantasy Football Commandments”
Thou shalt draft a running back in the first round
Thou shall not bench thy stud players, no matter what match up they have
Thou shalt avoid any team that ‘runs by committee’ (see rule No. 1…if you ignored it you will be haunted by the results of Rule No. 2)
Thou shalt not rely on no-name wide receivers who post huge games in Weeks One through Four…never to be heard from again
Thou shalt never draft someone else’s handcuffs until you draft your own
Thou shall not take a sleeper early………then it is no longer a sleeper
Thou shalt stick by thy draft strategy regardless of what the unenlightened opposition may do
Thou shall stick to your rankings while drafting
Thou shall never let your feelings for a certain NFL-team have any impact on how you manage your fantasy team
Thou shall not have faith in anything anyone tells you without research
So it is written…so it shall be done!