Monday - Oct 19, 2020

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The Icebox – One More Stern View

Doug Coutts did a great job on the Pistons/Pacers thing, so I won’t belabor the point.


I say “Hell Yes” to a great idea, and nice work Doug. Next time these teams play, the fans are not allowed to attend. Period.

David Stern should be commended. He did not over-react. In fact, there were stronger fines that could easily have been administered. He did the right thing with Artest.

The players were afraid, because people were throwing beer at them. That’s real scary. The chair didn’t come til the fracas was well out of hand. But there was a bigger issue at play here, and that issue is the reason I wholeheartedly support commissioner Stern in his decision.

Basketball has gotten ugly.

Nowadays it seems you gotta be gansta, rapper, hoodlum, punk and all that to be a hoop fan. Like English soccer…the fans are hoodlums. Yeah, I know, some fans are going to gripe and moan that THEY aren’t hoodlums. So all I can say is this comes from the heart. I used to love basketball. It was my second sport after football. I loved watching the Celtics and the Knicks, the Lakers and the Pistons, the Bulls and everyone else. Doctor J, Michael Jordan, Larry Bird, Kareem Abdul Jabaar…so many greats that broke records, pushed boundaries, and excelled at the game. With class. Now its all about bling bling, who’s got the most cha-ching, the nastiest tatoos, and the worst rap album.

So suspend the fans. Don’t let ‘em come to the games. And when they do, cage the courts off. To keep the players safe. Because it’s looking like Lions and Christians in the NBA these days.

Before it’s done we’ll see more appeals, more posturing, from the players association, and the players themselves. A bunch of overpaid crybabies if you ask me. You didn’t ask? Too bad.

Did David Stern act harshly? Yeah, I’d say so. He didn’t have much choice. He knew the media would replay the scenes over and over and over, enough to wear down the Energizer Bunny. His response had to be swift and sure. I’m betting he knew the harsh penalties he handed down wouldn’t resist a challenge from the players, but this way he comes out looking like the good guy. Eventually he’ll adjust some suspensions, maybe even Artest’s. I hope he doesn’t. For the sake of the game, I hope he sticks to his guns.


A quick note about football, since that’s why you are really here anyway. I need to coordinate things with Tony. Three times now we’ve picked the same big upset. And three times we’ve been wrong. Way wrong. Badly, mistakenly horrendously wrong. Tony, whatever the sauce was you were hitting, could you send some my way. I need it as a pain killer. An anaesthetic to numb the wounds. Because I have a feeling those radio listeners are going to remind me about this one. Forget Reuben Droughns, my must start guy. I said I’d sit Manning, unless I had no real decent substitute.

The last sound you may hear from the show on Fox Sports Radio may be my lynching. Bears Fan (one of the listeners) came out of hibernation, and now he’s gonna think I jinxed da Bears.

I’m also running into trouble with a capital T. I didn’t handcuff Martin and Holmes, and now both are out. I’m in big trouble if they stay gone. It’s been a scary season, but the fear was remote for me until now. I’ve watched in two of my leagues the leading team go down in flames after incredible starts. I still have a choice of Brees and Favre, and Rod Smith, Brandon Stokely, Hines Ward, Laverneous Coles and Nate Burleson. But I need those stud backs to make the final push for the post season. I’m looking at Julius Jones, Antowain Smith, and Nick Goings as replacements, and praying Onterrio Smith emerges from the morass known as the Vikings RBBC.

Like I said, I’m afraid. I’m very afraid.

A final Thanksgiving day joke, just because I thought it was really good.

A young man named John received a parrot as a gift. The parrot had a bad attitude and an even worse vocabulary. Every word out of the bird’s mouth was rude, obnoxious and laced with profanity. John tried and tried to change the bird’s attitude by consistently saying only
polite words, playing soft music and anything else he could think of to “clean up” the bird’s vocabulary. Finally, John was fed up and he yelled at the parrot. The parrot yelled back. John shook the parrot and the parrot got angrier and even ruder. John, in desperation,
threw up his hands, grabbed the bird and put him in the freezer. For a few minutes the parrot squawked and kicked and screamed. Then suddenly there was total quiet. Not a peep was heard for over a minute. Fearing that he’d hurt the parrot, John quickly opened the
door to the freezer. The parrot calmly stepped out onto John’s outstretched arms and said,

“I believe I may have offended you with my rude language and actions. I’m sincerely remorseful for my inappropriate transgressions and I fully intend to do everything I can to correct my rude and unforgivable behavior.”

John was stunned at the change in the bird’s attitude. As he was about to ask the parrot what had made such a dramatic change in his behavior, the bird continued…

“May I ask what the turkey did?”

I hope you all have a safe, happy and joyful Thanksgiving day weekend. Bless you all, and your families, and most of all, bless Fantasy Sharks!



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