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The Sin City BetBot 6000 Presents

Initially built by NASA to set lines for the Las Vegas casinos in the late 50’s (who do you think funded the Apollo missions?

The government?

It was the mob…), The Sin City


6000 calculated lines for over 30 years. The


was given various upgrades through the years, not always with the best
equipment, but he was very good at setting lines, and living the good




was de-commissioned in 1990 after San Francisco destroyed Denver in the
Super Bowl. The 45 point spread simply fried a number of the


wires and he retired. The


was discovered by and retooled to give fantasy
advice. He lives now to give his own unique, well cultured take on the



Sin City


6000 Presents is transcribed by Joe


and Tom Walls because “typing

.. .


is a dame’s job”.


Feedback Loop




Love the columns (and by the way, love the picks, you’ve made me some money) – I have a couple questions:

First off, I don’t believe you really know Tiger Woods.



you having your

year end


Lastly, I thought there should have been an

NFL game two

Saturday nights ago. What say you?



Maple Grove, MN

Jack, I love the questions. Well, not the first one. I never said that
I knew Tiger Woods all that well. I simply said that he was acting the
part of a world class cad; and causing great injury to his family.
However, I do see TW around my usual stomping ground in my beautiful
Las Vegas. I do my best to avoid him; I don’t like the guy.

I’ll answer your next two questions in opposite order.

am simply infuriated by the NFL’s choice to not air a game two weeks
ago on Saturday. I suppose the reason has to do with the Heisman Award
ceremony. What


I expect to see meaningful football games on Saturday nights from Labor
Day through January 1. Now normally those are college games, but once
college season is over, I expect the NFL to pick up the damn slack.

There was an NFL game last Saturday, why not one two weeks ago?

The Heisman Award?

The Heisman Award show is the worst football related show out there. Is there anything more boring (OK, watching Billy Sim

act inappropriately in the background is fun, but that’s it!)? The
Heisman Awards are like the Oscars except no beautiful broads, and no
clips of Heath Ledger! Honestly, the Heisman Award Show could start at
6:30 or 7:00 PM on the East


it doesn’t need to start at 8:00 PM. It’s a Saturday people! … BZZZT…  No football on a December Saturday night? That is quite simply a dereliction of duty NFL. Poor form.

Get it damned right in 2010, OK?

Lastly, I am happy to report our 45


Annual Year End Awards, remember – these are based on your suggestions
and comments so if you don’t like it then take the beam out of your own

QB – Aaron Rodgers/GB

While the old man was making a lot of noise up in Minnesota, the real
deal was going to work back in Wisconsin for the Packers.  Rodgers was
projected to be good but really turned it on this year with a nice
4200+ and 30+ effort (assuming he doesn’t lay down like a dog this
weekend.)  But what really stood out was the ridiculous 300+ rushing
yards and 4 rushing TDs, easily the best amongst the top tier QBs. 
Where …BZT… did that come from?  This is like the time Ryan Klesko
stole 20 bases.  Nicely done, sir – clearly Ted Thompson made the right
move, and if you see the old man in the playoffs, stab him in the heart
with a silver dagger – that’s the only way!

RB – Chris Johnson/TEN

– Midway through the season the Titans were 0-6 and massively awful. 
Then Jeff Fisher woke the hell up.  The rest, as they say, is history. 
I’ve been complaining about the Johnson/White time share in Tennessee
since the start of last season, and with nothing left to lose Fisher
finally just started giving CJ the ball.  He needed more TDs to have a
truly historic fantasy season but he’ll get close to 2000+ rushing
yards and that’s a late first round pick you can live with.

WR – Miles Austin/DAL

– Lots of calls for Andre Johnson but you need more than 9 TDs to play
in this race.  The real winner here likely went undrafted in your
league and then went on to post 1200+ yards and 11 TDs.  Austin also
did it without complaining about the fact that Tony Romo won’t rub his
nether region when it’s sore on game day, something the other WRs in
Dallas seem wont to moan about.  The best part about Austin’s emergence
is that Roy Williams still maintains that he’s the #1 WR, whatever that
means.  I think it means that Roy’s on drugs.

TE – Vernon Davis/SF
– This is a slam dunk.  Long forgotten after Singletary threw him out
of a game last year, Davis finally lived up to his press as he posted
12 TDs on the year.  Look, TEs don’t get enough looks to post on a
regular basis, and Davis was the best option in the Niners offense. 
Nobody saw that coming in August.



Grand Champion Award

(the most valuable player for all of fantasy football) –

Chris Johnson
– Never before has an RB1 been so valuable, what with the RBBC plague
that’s taken over the NFL.  There are only a few in the league this
year, and CJ had the best season.  I also appreciate how he has the
solid gold teeth. Nice dental work.

LVP Awards

QB – Jay Cutler

– When you picked Cutler fairly high in your draft, because he was like
a young Brett Favre, you probably expected the Favre TDs, not the Favre
INTs.  You got hosed.  On the other hand, you still have your first
round pick next season.  The Bears?  Not so much.

RB – Matt Forte

– Not to pile on Chicago here, but WTF?  Forte hasn’t had the best
blocking but after his rookie season we were expecting more than a
handful of TDs.  Probably your first round pick if you have him, and he
was hopefully benched by week 10 if you wanted to salvage the season. 
The backup looks 10x faster than Forte, and that’s never a good sign. 
It’s like he took what surprised you last year and did the exact

WR – Roy Williams/DAL

– Some votes for TJ Houshmandzadeh but if you expected anything but
middling numbers from a receiver who has posted mostly middling numbers
for his whole career, is past his 30th birthday, and is going from
Carson Palmer to Matt Hasselbeck, you got just what you deserved.  Let
this be a lesson.  No, the real LVP is the self proclaimed #1 WR for
Dallas, who has posted almost nothing this year despite talking a game
like the man he replaced, Terrell Owens (an LVP candidate himself.) 
Once upon a time Roy was a fantasy legend, scoring all the time if he
could only stay on the field.  Well, he’s traded durability for
productivity, and chances are Cowboys fans would like him to go back to
being often hurt but productive.  On the other hand, we get to make fun
of the Double-J for another personnel blunder – can’t get enough of

TE – Jason Witten/DAL
– This seems like an odd choice given his solid yardage totals, but
those have been padded by a few recent efforts after a bunch of 4-60-0
type games for the rest of the year.  One touchdown?  From the
consensus #1 TE in fantasy football?  This season was a tease, and an
insult to Witten owners who expected occasional flashes of brilliance
but instead received a steady diet of 3 points per week.  Let’s end
this discussion before it gets personal.

The Merrill


Grand Balloon Knot Award

(this is not a good award…it’s like the opposite of the Grand Champion Award,


?) –

Matt Forte
– He was probably a top 5 pick in your league, and in keeper leagues
you were probably thinking you had a keeper worthy of a dynasty.  What
you actually have looks like a running back on his last legs.  He
shouldn’t even be the starter in Chicago if they get the coaching staff
together.  Sorry about that.


So long for now, and remember “Showgirls and gin my friends, showgirls and …BZT…gin.”

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