Monday - Jun 24, 2019

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Thinking Out Loud – XII

Off the Subject….Just Thinking XII…

It’s good to be back…

Now that Danny Ainge is back in the news, let me clarify something here:  Danny Ainge had HIS finger BITTEN by Tree Rollins.  In other words, Tree Rollins bit Danny Ainge’s finger.  There is no disputing this and I’m not even sure how the story ever got reversed.  Ainge had to have his finger stitched up and pictures CLEARLY showed the incident as it took place.  The only thing not confirmed is that Ainge had to have a rabies shot as a precaution. 

What’s the deal with some of the official scoring in baseball?  I’ve seen many CLEAR errors be scored as a hit.  These are major league ballplayers we’re talking about here, when a guy misses a grounder because he doesn’t have the sack to get in front of the ball, that’s an error in my book.  Outfielder fights the sun and loses the battle, that’s an error.  Case closed.

Let’s extend a warm welcome to Bonnie Bernstein for being unanimously chosen to enter the Jim Gray Sports Reporter Hall of SHAME!!  I understand her asking Roy Williams once in her post-game interview about North Carolina, had to be done.  Being the gentleman that he is, he dodged the question with a slight barb (“…I respect you as a reporter, but not as a human being for asking that right now…”)…there was NO NEED for her to continue the line of questions.  I for one, was ecstatic that he mentioned something about not liking a Carolina shiitake mushroom, then storming out of the interview.  Sweet.

Of course, we all knew he was going to take the job anyways like he did…

Once again, I have to stoop to bathroom humor…men, in the office, there is no reason whatsoever for you to emerge from the throne when someone else is also in the room.  None whatsoever.  Hang out until you are alone.  This is one of the sacred bathroom rules. 

Related, rule above has no bearing on women, they instinctively know not to even ENTER a bathroom that someone else is already in there. 

So there I was, had a tough day and was looking to make myself feel a little better…what better way to do so than to watch a train wreck on television!!  It was a weeknight, so no NASCAR, then I remembered, American Idol would be voting off one of their singers.  Gawd, that’s a terrible show, but train wreck makes it worth watching.  For those that haven’t seen the show, they all sing one night, then America votes, then the next night they announce the one person that will be sent home – basically a five minute show that they stretch out to a half an hour (or even an hour!) in order to jam in 20 commercials, show the coke bottle in front of an aged Paula Abdul ten times, and get in five shots of angry Simon in a tee shirt he used to wear in high school.  (Whoa, this one getting long, lemme tie it up for you).  So they finally get to the very end where one person will be sent home (which was after they made the two potentials sing a song that sounded worse than it did the previous night when they were trying to be good), then the announcer says that no one will be sent home this week.  No train wreck, I’m still furious.  I will never watch a portion of that show again.  Then again, I’m not sure why I even watched it in the first place….

How about this for a plan, when lawmakers drop the ball on their state budget, how about they take a month furlough to make up for their inept governing…instead of having to cut programs and raise taxes and fees.  Let’s take some responsibility in your work, eh?

Why is it that the death of a kitchen appliance always involves a lot of water?  RIP to my refrigerator. 

I’m eagerly awaiting Michael Jordan’s next farewell tour.

Speaking of retiring, Ricky Henderson should go down in baseball history as one of the greatest players to ever play the game.  There is no argument here. 

I say this every year, I will not and cannot understand either people or objects being thrown onto the field at any sporting event.  I just don’t get it.  This needs to come to an end.

I don’t get baseball brawls either.  Less than a month into the season and benches are clearing?  The baseball commissioner (is there one?) needs to step up and eliminate this.  Simply enforce a rule that any player leaving the bench will get an automatic one game suspension, end of story.  This has worked in both the NBA and NHL.  This needs to happen.  With this rule in place, perhaps the batter would think twice about charging the mound, knowing that it will be mano vs nine. 

Normally I don’t like to plug a TV show (ha), but if you haven’t seen MTV’s Punk’d, you gotta check it out.  Yes, it’s a little childish and goofy, but worth a viewing or two.  Basically, the host pulls practical jokes on celebrities, good stuff.  Of course, it doesn’t hurt that it’s on right before Jackass. 

Anyone else see shades of Livian Hernandez (years ago in World Series for Florida) during Kevin Millwood’s no-hitter?  I mean, could the strike zone have been any wider AND higher?

Why isn’t anyone furious that the Ravens cost the Vikings two spots in the draft order?  In case you missed it, the Vikings and Ravens had agreed to a deal for Minnesota’s pick (7th overall), but when Baltimore phoned in the deal and their selection to the Commish, the line was “busy”.  Jacksonville at #8 had no problem quickly getting their pick to the podium, selecting the player that Baltimore wanted (Leftwich) so the Ravens pulled out of the deal with Minnesota – but by that time Carolina had rushed their pick (#9) to the podium as well.  Minnesota says they ended up with the player they would have taken anyway (Williams), but now his agent says he’ll be asking for pick #7 money instead of #9 money.  Poor Minnesota and shame on Baltimore.

And what of Detroit fabricating a complete lie in order to scare Charles Rogers into signing just before the draft?  Again, in case you missed it, the Lions made up a story that the Patriots were offering their two first round picks (14 and 19 overall) for Detroit’s #1 (2nd overall).  Of course, radio stations in Boston picked it up and ran with it even though there was absolutely no truth to the story. 

Why do professional players say things like, “…it’s crazy how much money they pay you to play a sport you love…I’d play for free.”  Um, ok, Carson Palmer, why don’t you then and save the fans from having to shell out $100 a piece to watch you….

Let me get this straight, Rafael Palmiero hits a ton of home runs and he’s a lock for the Hall of Fame, yet a feared hitter like Jim Rice can’t get a wiff of the front door, what am I missing here?  If only viagra were around in Rice’s era….

Speaking of baseball, why don’t umpires ever use ‘discretion’?  When a guy hits a two out double, the man on first base is gonna score and he should be waved in on a ground rule double.  I have never seen it happen. 

With all the talk of Mike Piazza moving to first base before he blew a groin, perhaps wrong choice of wording, let me tell you, ANY ball player can make the transition over there.  Trust me, it’s not that hard.  You catch the ball with one foot on the base, and to boot you get to wear a glove that you could fit a week’s worth of groceries in.  Not difficult people.  There is little room to cover, you hardly move, and you rarely have to throw the ball. 

While on the subject, with summer here, I’m reminded of the three reasons that baseball players play baseball (and what I miss most about not playing in the park league anymore):  1) Seeds, 2) Touching/adjusting yourself is not only allowed but encouraged, 3) Spitting.

You gotta love reading a quote like this, “In this game, integrity is very important for us and for the gamblers.”

You haven’t seen cute until you’ve seen an 18 month old do the Humpty Dance.

Can anyone explain to me that by mid-May, I already had done positional rankings for the upcoming football season?  Yes, I am insane, six drafts already completed with another starting up next week. 

If you’re supposed to make lemonade when life gives you lemon, what are you supposed to do when your dog gets sprayed by a skunk?

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