Monday - Jan 21, 2019

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To Sir, With Love

Initially built by NASA to set lines for the Las Vegas casinos in the late 50’s (who do you think funded the Apollo missions? The government? It was the mob…), The Sin City Betbot 6000 calculated lines for over 30 years. The Betbot was given various upgrades through the years, not always with the best equipment, but he was very good at setting lines, and living the good life.

The Betbot was de-commissioned in 1990 after San Francisco destroyed Denver in the Super Bowl. The 45 point spread simply fried a number of the Betbot’s wires and he retired. The Betbot was discovered by and retooled to give fantasy advice. He lives now to give his own unique, well cultured take on the NFL.The Sin City Betbot 6000 Presents is transcribed by Joe Petrizzi and Tom Walls because “typing.. .BZZT… is a dame’s job”.


AUGUST 5, 1966



Sidney Poitier
is a close personal friend of mine. I first befriended him as an actor working Summer stock in Central Park. I visited him during the filming of the movie
To Sir, With Love
. I swung by in early June, and immediately caught the eye of a young Scottish lass who knew a good thing when she…BZZZT… saw it.

She had a long friggin’ name, and I immediately gave her the nickname
. She had a bit part in the movie, but I worked with the director to give her a bigger role. I also gave Lulu the confidence to audition to sing the theme song.

Lulu was nothing but a summer love for me, and I thought Lulu knew that also. I was wrong, I had to get back to Vegas because the NFL season was right around the corner, and I needed to get back home, besides the movie was almost done filming. Ahhh… but our passionate, sweaty Sessions of Sweet were truly memorable. The voice of an angel – even when not singing in front of an audience.

I left London August 5th to Lulu’s despair. She immediately rewrote the words to the song ‘To Sir , With Love’ to reflect my Svengali-like influence on her. I didn’t like seeing her cry, but I had a job to do…Many NFL fanbases are crying now – but at least they have next year to look forward to… I wasn’t going back to that clingy Scottish banshee; that was for sure.


I was on-hand for the Vikings-Packers game in Green Bay. That game changed at the end of the first half after Mason Crosby hit a (relatively easy) 47-yard field goal in the third quarter. Crosby had missed a field goal earlier in the game; and has been pretty horrible year-to-date (15-for-24 in FG attempts including last week). Crosby trotted out again for another attempt, and hit it. The team seemed to rally, and crushed the Vikings for the rest of the contest. Calling momentum and motivation in-game is one of the toughest parts of coaching – and
Mike McCarthy
called it right.

Speaking of the Packers, they are 8-4 with the Bears breathing down their necks at 7-5. If the Packers lose against the Lions this week, their game against the Bears the next week becomes a must-win to secure the division. If they lose against Chicago – the early season botched call against the Seahawks looms very large indeed – especially given the fact that they could be up against the Seahawks for a Wild Card spot.

The Giants are the best of a mediocre bunch in the NFC East, but every team except for San Francisco in the NFC should be worried come playoff time.

Robert Griffin III

is fun to watch, eh? I worry that with the NFL’s new focus on concussions, he may not have a career longer than 6-7 years. The Shanahans in Washington need to start limiting his carries ASAP to add some years to his career.

I can’t recall three crappier quarterbacks on one team than the troika of

? Not since the Scab Player games… atrocious. Who the hell is picking the talent in Arizona, and why do they still have a job? Arizona – your starting QB next year will be
Mike Vick.

Larry Fitzgerald
has been rendered absolutely useless for fantasy owners – disgusting.


Reports indicate that the Chargers are going to fire head coach
Norv Turner
and GM
AJ Smith.
  Well, I did tell you it was coming, and if Smith had done the right thing and sent Turner packing last year he might have saved his job.

The haves and have-nots:  There are four teams with a positive point differential greater than 100.  Three of them in the AFC (Patriots, Texans, Broncos.)  There are five teams with with a negative point differential greater than 100.  Four of them are in the AFC (Titans, Chiefs, Jaguars, Raiders.)  Clearly there is a problem sharing the wealth.

After their win over the Lions on Sunday, it’s almost a lock that the Colts make the playoffs. They’ll get to 10 wins. Good for them. A word about
Andrew Luck

– Luck’s team may have the better record, but RGIII has been the better player. A lot will be made about Luck and how he’s a winner, because his team will make the playoffs and the Redskins will not. Do not be misled.

I have not mentioned the Bills in this space in some time, mostly because they are terrible. But it’s worth noting that BetBot favorite
CJ Spiller

leads all running backs in yards per attempt with 6.6. Those of you in keeper leagues take note. Also worth noting – QB
Ryan Fitzpatrick
once again faded after a hot start – 12 TDs in the first four weeks, eitht TDs since. If he’s back in Buffalo after this year I would be surprised.

Rex Ryan named
Mark Sanchez

the starter for Sunday. So you can pencil him in for those critical points earned when the QB fumbles the ball after running into his offensive linemen. Meanwhile, this is the best thing that happened for those of us that recognize
Tim Tebow
can’t play at this level.  If you can’t get on the field ahead of Sanchez, it’s time to call it, pal.  I was worried after the playoff win over Pittsburgh last year, but that is thankfully long forgotten now that
Peyton Manning
is showing what the Broncos could be with an actual QB under center.

So long for now, and remember “Showgirls and gin my friends, showgirls and …BZT…gin.”

About Fantasy Sharks began in 2003, disseminating fantasy football content on the web for free. It is, or has been, home to some of the most talented and best known fantasy writers on the planet. Owned and operated by Tony Holm (5 time Fantasy Sports Writer Association Hall-of-Fame nominee,) Tony started writing fantasy content in 1993 for the only three fantasy football web sites in existence at the time.