Friday - Jan 22, 2021

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Week 11 Notes

Initially built by NASA to set lines for the Las Vegas casinos in the late 50’s (who do you think funded the Apollo missions? The government? It was the mob…), The Sin City Betbot 6000 calculated lines for over 30 years. The Betbot was given various upgrades through the years, not always with the best equipment, but he was very good at setting lines, and living the good life.

The Betbot was de-commissioned in 1990 after San Francisco destroyed Denver in the Super Bowl. The 45 point spread simply fried a number of the Betbot’s wires and he retired. The Betbot was discovered by and retooled to give fantasy advice. He lives now to give his own unique, well cultured take on the NFL.The Sin City Betbot 6000 Presents is transcribed by Joe Petrizzi and Tom Walls because “typing.. .BZZT… is a dame’s job”.

I’m taking a cue from the Indianapolis Colts this week and mailing in the intro. Still, I grow tired of the “Suck for Luck” phrase. The Colts suck because they are awful, not because they want to get a nice draft choice and select a QB. That’s what the fans want, but by the time

Andrew Luck makes a difference the schmoes on the current roster will be long gone – or at least they better be if they want to have a chance of competing post-Manning.

NFC Notes

Dallas beat up on a weak Buffalo defense. I’m not getting excited about this team yet;
DeMarco Murray
is the real deal though. We’ll see how he holds up over a full NFL season.

San Francisco kept the Giants in the game until the end of the game; but they won. I don’t see them winning two games in the playoffs, but I can see them winning one. It was very gracious of
Captain Comeback
to not slap
Tom Coughlin
too hard after the win. Way to show some class and win with grace, Harbaugh.

Detroit certainly hit the skids. This bout with losing seems to coincide with
Jahvid Best’s
injury. The defense has looked particularly crappy lately too. I’m not sure why that is,
Ndamukong Suh
may be wearing down very quickly. I think other teams have figured out the best way to score points against the Lions is to stick to the edges and avoid Suh altogether.

The Rams beat the Browns 13-12. I just threw up a little bit in my mouth.

A couple weeks ago I wrote that …BZZT… the Falcons needed to find a playmaker on offense. It’s apparent that
Mike Smith
reads my column because they started feeding
Julio Jones
the ball, and balancing his big play potential with
Michael Turner
running the ball to wear down the defensive line.

Can we now please declare
Mike Shanahan
as nothing more than an average coach? Seriously, what has this genius done without
John Elway
Terrell Davis
? Anything? The Shanahans are damned lucky to have
Jim Haslett
as a defensive coordinator. The arrogance of Shanahan to take the job and groom his son as his replacement sickens me. The only entertaining thing the Shanahans have done in years is to frustrate and embarrass
Donovan McNabb
to tears.

NFC Notes

Tebow Time
in Denver, which basically means he’s on a hot streak and we’re about to make more of this than his play really warrants.  Cue the sportswriters trying to sell a narrative.  Look, we knew Tebow was a playmaker from his days at Florida, but this kind of talent has a way of getting squashed before long.  Enjoy the ride while it lasts.  I mean, if you’re a prude.

Speaking of rides coming to an end, Buffalo has quietly lost a couple in a row (combined score 71-18.)  We talked about this weeks ago – if you can’t rush the passer, you cannot sustain the rate the Bills were forcing turnovers earlier this season.  That’s ok, at least they have a franchise QB locked up.  Wait,
Ryan Fitzpatrick
?  This franchise is a mess.

Houston will be in trouble without
Matt Schaub
.  I’ve always liked
Matt Leinart
, basically because he’s my favorite example of why kids should leave college as soon as they can reasonably expect to be drafted.  And also because he’s always surrounded himself with some real loose women. Can’t beat that.

I don’t care how bad Leinart plays down the stretch – the AFC South is already over, barring some miracle in Tennessee where they start scoring like an NFL team.

The Colts are currently -169 in point differential.  That is truly embarrassing and I wish to halt discussion of this topic immediately.

The AFC North is becoming quite the showdown, with the Steelers, Bengals, and Ravens all posting only 3 losses and all showing a nice, positive point differential.  Let me guess – they play the NFC West this year?  

/checks schedule


/does not forget they also have the Browns twice

OK, so about that AFC North – not that impressed despite the nice records.  Pittsburgh could make a run, but the other two don’t have the QB play.

Seriously, the Patriots are looking like the clear best team in the AFC.  Solid peripherals and a nice record, and the only team that’s really close is Houston which is now starting Hot Tub Hero at QB for the near future.  The AFC West is a suckstorm, and 3/4 of the AFC South is similarly wasted.  So it’s basically the Pats and the AFC North winner.

I got e-mail last week complaining I never wrote about the Bengals, as if I were capable of bias.  No, the only reason I am ignoring Cincy is because they have never failed to let me down, so I refuse to get excited.  This year will be no different.

So long for now, and remember “Showgirls and gin my friends, showgirls and …BZT…gin.”

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